They've Found Bigfoot!

Just a couple of days ago, I mentioned that I have somewhat of a phobia of Bigfoot, the legendary ape-like creature that supposedly stalks the Pacific Northwest.

And wouldn’t you know it, right after I posted that, my brother emailed a news report to me. Apparently, two hunters in Georgia have found a Bigfoot carcass. They’re going to give a press release tomorrow in California at noon (Friday, August 15th).

See? See? I was perfectly justified in my phobia about Bigfoot.

They’ve found one!

Apparently, the carcass stands 7’ 7” and weighs over 500 pounds. It has 26-inch long feet and it’s a male. And his thingy is. . . well. . . . nevermind.

The hunters have said they’ll provide DNA evidence and lots of photos at the press conference, but no actual Bigfoot carcass. Apparently, they’ve been hunting Bigfoot for a long time and have also claimed to have caught one twice before. And they were going to provide evidence a couple of times before.

One of the hunters is trying to sell a documentary called, "Bigfoot Lives" and he also once tried to get TV viewers to shell out $59.95 for pay-per-view footage of a captured Bigfoot.

Those were hoaxes.

But this time, it’s for real they say.

They have the carcass stored in a freezer right now and have provided the following photograph:

Ummmm. That sort of looks like a gorilla suit stuffed into a broken down deep freeze to me.

I'm sure many of you have seen the famous 1967 Patterson film of an encounter with Bigfoot. Click here for an enhanced verson of it.

Frankly, I think that's a man in a monkey suit. Everyone knows Bigfoot doesn't walk like that.

But tomorrow, these guys are going to have a press conference and reveal everything.

So! Tomorrow at noon, folks! Stay tuned.

If it IS an actual Bigfoot, I’m going to have nightmares the rest of my life.

Something tells me I’ll be sleeping well from here on out.