Saturday, October 27, 2007

I'm a Snooty Chicagoan

I left Springfield (Illinois) in my rental car at 3:00 pm.

On Friday.

Apparently, "Chicago traffic" begins on Friday mornings and immediately extends itself across the entire state, much like California fires or Britney's hoo-hoo.

I don't own a car and had no idea that EVERYONE in Illinois AND Iowa AND Missouri, drives an automobile into Chicago every Friday night.

Really.

Apparently, they do this!

Every Friday.

After making corn relish,
they hop in their vehicles and and haul it into the city.

It's horrible.

For two hours on a Friday night, I was stuck in stop-n-go traffic waiting to get into the city into which I live. That's just not right.

Illinois should adopt the following state motto:

"If you live in Iowa, please remember you state motto:

Iowa: Gateway to Kansas! "

However, no one informed me that suicidal tendencies do, indeed, occur after listening to the first five albums of Enya in a row.

Really.

My boss loves Enya and everything remotely "Celtic."

. . . Watermark
. . . Shepherd Moons
. . . The Memory of Trees . . . .

I can tell you , that if I ever hear one more phrase of:

"AAaaahhh. . .
. . . Ahh. . . Aaahhhh???"

I will absolutely drive a brand new rental car off a cliff near Joliet, Illinois.

Just so you know.

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4 Comments:

At 11:14 AM , Blogger Kimberly Ann said...

That cracked me up, but I'm glad you didn't crack up on the highway.

 
At 12:28 PM , Blogger Lorraine said...

Ok, remember when I told you that there was no way Chicago had "traffic" like we had traffic? It's because all your traffic comes from out of state. And of course, we were too busy eating and drinking to noticeall those freaks.

Welcome home,sweetie.

 
At 5:41 PM , Anonymous Poodle :) said...

Dooder, John & I hit the Friday night traffic, too, on the way to my parents this weekend...what a pain in the *ss!!!!

I'm glad you made it back here safe and sound, though...we need to go out and gorge ourselves on some good Chicago food this week! *smiles*

Love,

Poodle :)

 
At 9:41 AM , Blogger Buck said...

KA: Thanks. It was close, but I made it back.

Lorraine: It's soooo good to be home!

Pood: Yes, let us gorge. I'm definitely in the mood.

 

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