My Little Farm -- Five Hundred Feet Up

I have this huge balcony with my little apartment on the 49th floor.

It has nothing on it.

I keep some folding canvas chairs in a closet if I need them, but so far I've yet to use them. It's either too windy or too cold to be out on the balcony. Or, my guests are afraid of heights and won't venture out there.

Anyway, I decided to try my hand at growing some crops. (No, not marijuana. I don't like marijuana). But I do like home-grown tomatoes and fresh basil, oregano, and mint.

I had two free hours left on my Zip Car, a 160 square-foot balcony facing west with nothing on it, so I talked Miss Healthypants into schlepping out to Home Depot with me to procure the necessary crops and retail farm equipment.

Let's see, Roma tomatoes, basil, oregano, mint, two big bags of potting soil, two big pots and tomato cages. That should do it.

I'm not very good at growing plants, mainly because I'm usually oblivious to my surroundings and, well, apparently plants require water. So, after I gathered up all the plants, I announced, "Let's get these home so I can KILL THEM."

So, here is my little farm in the middle of the city.

Whaddya think? Will it work?

I thought about just letting the tomato plants grow on the balcony railings but the balcony is 500 feet above the sidewalk below. That's a long way for an errant tomato to fall and strike someone. Although that would be humorous in a way that Attack of the Killer Tomatoes was funny, in actuality, it wouldn't be a good thing.

So, I bought tomato cages and will fasten them to the railing so they don't fly away.

After all, we can't have tomato cages flying all about downtown Chicago.

Now, if I can only remember that my little farm is out there so I can water it . . . .