I want this!

I just received a new cell phone with new bells and whistles on it, most of which I think are really, well, . . . stupid.

I'm not going to use the photo-taking option because I have a digital camera for that. Besides, I don't want to pay the extra fee for sending photos and also, I don't want to have to learn how to operate that feature. No one does.

I've had several friends who get the ability to send a photo from their new cell phones, I get ONE picture from them ("Hey, look! I can send a pic from my cell phone!") and then they never use that feature again.

I'm not going to use the text-messaging features because if I want to send someone a message I will simply call them and leave a voice mail!!! I can speak a thousand times faster than I can text-message. I don't understand these kids nowadays who really get off to thumbing away on their phones.

My new phone has V-something capability where I can download music and use my phone as an MP3 player. I already have an i-Pod and, and besides, cell phones never have enough battery life in them as it is. I'm not about to use up what little battery power it has when I can use my i-Pod the way God intended.

And why are cell phones getting smaller and smaller? How are we supposed to cradle it in our neck when they're the size of a Tic-Tac?

So, to make a statement against all these bells-and-whistles and teeny-weeny phones, here's a big honkin' rotary-dial cell phone! (It uses "Bluehair" technology) Doncha just love it?

I want this! I really do!

Can you imagine how many looks this would get, using this on the train? The kitsch factor is over-the-top.