Obama Reveals Unsuccesful Run for President of Kenya

This is a brilliant piece of satire from the Borowitz Report:

Obama Reveals Unsuccessful Run for President of Kenya
Disqualified by U.S. Birth Certificate

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report) – In a stunning announcement that took even political insiders by surprise, President Barack Obama revealed today that he ran for President of Kenya in 2005 but was disqualified when a birth certificate surfaced showing he was born in the United States.

At a press conference at the White House, Mr. Obama spoke for the first time about his little-known unsuccessful foray into Kenyan politics: “Like every American boy or girl, I grew up with the dream of someday becoming President of Kenya.”

But soon after he entered the race, political opponents began spreading rumors that he was not “a real Kenyan,” the President said, and foiled his bid by disseminating copies of his authentic American birth certificate.

“I guess I didn’t look into the rules closely enough before I ran,” the President admitted. “I got caught up in the excitement of being President of Kenya and I guess I just got carried away.”

Lisimba Ogongo, a Nairobi talk radio host who spearheaded the effort to unearth Mr. Obama’s U.S. birth certificate, confirmed Mr. Obama’s version of events today.

“I felt strongly that the people of Kenya deserved the truth,” Mr. Ogongo said. “We were not about to elect a President of Kenya who was really a secret Hawaiian.”

Elsewhere, Donald Trump found himself under renewed pressure to produce all of his authentic marriage certificates, believed to number in the thousands.

Finally!

Yesterday, the Trump Tower finally "topped out" at 92 stories. It is now the second tallest building in Chicago. The building where I work, The Aon Center, has now been relegated to the third tallest, just in case any of you were wondering.


Now, if only Donald would do something about his hair. . . .

Trump Tower

Donald Trump's thing is getting bigger each day now.
Here it is at 46 stories.
Halfway up.

Morning View -- Trump Tower

Here's a pic of Donald Trump's new endeavor in Chicago, the new Trump International Hotel and Tower. When completed, it'll be the second tallest building in Chicago at 1,362 feet tall unless Rosie O'Donnell gets mad and tears it down. (I'll bet she could, too)

Here it is at 36 stories -- only sixty more to go.