Monday, January 19, 2009

I Have a Dream. . .

Yesterday while watching coverage of the upcoming inauguration, I found it very entertaining to switch between CNN and Fox News.

First, I was watching CNN, rather, I really just have it on all the time in my apartment anyway. CNN seemed to be broadcasting non-stop coverage of deliriously happy people being interviewed by news reporters – none of whom I’d ever seen before.

Then, CNN would switch to several more news commentators (none of whom had ever been seen before) all sitting in a circle and analyzing what the deliriously happy people had said.

It was a non-stop love fest. There was no news coverage going on. None at all.
So I switched to Bill O’Reilly over on Fox.

Oh my goodness.

Within ten minutes of watching him, he had commented that Washington D.C. was “a zoo” and that he hoped all the spectators “behaved themselves” during the next couple of days. Then he started “opining” about Rev. Gene Robinson, the openly gay Episcopalian bishop, and I had to change the channel.

I watched an enthralling documentary about theoretical quantum physics on The Geek Channel instead.

Yes, I’m awfully glad that Obama will be our president, don’t get me wrong. I'm even a bit delirious as well. It’s just that the 24-hour news stations seem to go overboard with the sensational item-of-the-day and neglect all the other news.

Yes, a plane went down on the Hudson River the other day and it’s wonderful that everyone was okay. But we don’t need to hear non-stop playbacks of every 9-1-1 call that was phoned in for the next 24 hours. I might also like to keep up with what’s going on in Russia or China for a little while. They're big countries and lots of stuff goes on there.

American television news is like that -- twenty-four hour sensationalism.

I miss the National News back in Canada – or as Canadians call it, simply “The National”. You’d have a non-descript news anchor give the news accordingly:

Subject, fact, fact, fact, concluding sentence.
Subject, fact, fact, fact, concluding sentence.
Subject, fact, fact, fact, concluding sentence.
Hockey scores
Hockey scores
Hockey scores
Weather – (twenty kilometers below zero, snow)
Update on Wayne Gretzky.

There is no news commentary in Canada. Canadians don't express their opinions. At all. Unless it's about hockey.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road in Canada?
A: To get to the middle.

Okay, one other thing I have to get off my chest is about our future First Lady, Michelle Obama. She’s gorgeous, classy, intelligent, articulate and seems to be the perfect mom.

Barack Obama seems to be modeling his presidency after the great Abraham Lincoln, so frankly, I’d like to see a just a touch of a Mary Todd Lincoln thing going on there too. I think it would be great to see Michelle Obama get a little bit of Mary Todd in her and just lose it all over Bill O’Reilly.

Yes, I have a dream.

For that, I’d watch Fox News.

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At 3:59 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

They should move Canada to a warmer climate. I'd totally move there.

At 5:01 PM , Blogger QuotidianEditorialist said...

I have a dream too....that Bill O'Reilly is sent to Canada where he freezes to death.


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