In Effingham

I'm currently in Effingham, Illinois attending a conference. Effingham, for those of you who don't know, is 210 miles due south of Chicago. It's a long, boring drive.

While in these small towns thoughout Illinois, I often like to visit the local Wal-Mart in order to stock up on items at Everyday Low Prices. You see, living in downtown Chicago, we don't have access to Everyday Low Prices.  Or to any big stores at Regular Prices for that matter. So, when I can, I stock up on toiletries, underpants, cheap clothing, bulk items and occasional bath and kitchen doo-dahs and what-nots.

I'm sure you've all seen the "People at Wal-Mart" photos that have been circulating around the interwebs. They're pretty scary and (I'll admit) hilarious at the same time. I was hoping to get some of these photos for myself, but I went to Wal-Mart around 9 pm and I guess the good people of Effingham don't shop at that time of night. I was practically by myself.

The only interesting thing that caught my eye were these two signs.

Does anyone know what the difference between "Hispanic Food" and "Latino Food" is -- especially in central Illinois? These signs were close by each other and I couldn't identify anything identifiable in the food items. I should have asked someone at Wal-Mart but I was tired after the four-hour drive. (Normally, it would take me three hours but I got stuck in Bears traffic after the game.)

I'm looking forward to a Big Slamming Breakfast at Denny's in the morning. If the server asks if I want ham, bacon or sausage, my reply will surely be, "I don't want any effing ham."

. . . like she's never heard that before.