Peoria!

OOOoooo. I’m busy, getting ready for my exciting trip to Peoria and Springfield.

Soon, I’ll be dining on the fine cuisine of chain restaurants in the heartland. The Applebee’s in Peoria just rocks.

I make fun of these places just because I’m a snooty Chicagoan, which is precisely what people in the rest of Illinois don’t like about us.

Actually, Peoria is a pretty neat little city. There’s this huge river that runs through it (I don’t know which one it is), and you enter the city over this monster of a bridge (I don’t know the name of it). I really like big bridges, so I always look forward to that.

Oh, I found a nice photo. Here is Peoria at night:

There are lots of riverboat casinos in Peoria which folks seem to enjoy. Frankly, I just don’t “get” gambling. I can honestly say that I’ve never gambled in my whole life. Not once. So, I probably won’t be on the riverboat casino.

I joke about the food in all these chain restaurants, but I have to admit there’s one food item that I really look forward to on these trips. And that’s getting a double Whopper at Burger King. (There aren’t any Burger Kings in downtown Chicago that I know of).

I’ve finally learned how to order a double Whopper the way I like it.

You see, their Whoppers come with mayonnaise, which I like. But I also like mustard on them too but they don’t come with mustard. They have a Mustard Whopper, but that doesn’t have mayonnaise, hence the name.

I want both mustard and mayo which, apparently, causes incredible mayhem and confusion amongst the Burger King staff:

Here’s how it all went down at the drive-thru:

“I’d like a double Whopper with mustard, please. That’s all” (I always end with “that’s all” because they always try to peddle something else with it like fries or a drink “Would you like to try a Whopping Pudding with that tonight?”)

“You only want mustard on it? Nothing else?”

“No, I want mayonnaise on it too. Thanks”

“Only mustard and mayonnaise”

“No, I want everything on it too. And mustard too”

“So you want a Mustard Whopper?”

“No, a Double Whopper but with mustard. That’s all”

“Only mustard?”

“No, I want everything on it. But I want mustard on it too.”

“Oh! Then that would be a double Whopper, ADD mustard.”

“Yes! Thank you.” (at that point, I want to reach in, grab her hand and put it on my nodding face like Anne Sullivan did with Helen Keller - - "Yesss!!")

“Would you like to try some fries with that tonight?. . . . “

So, apparently I enjoy a double Whopper, ADD mustard.

Also, in Springfield there’s this fantastic seafood restaurant called the Chesapeake Seafood House.

I know!

Seafood in Springfield Illinois; which is really surprising seeing that Springfield is in the middle of a state that’s in the middle of the country which is just about as far removed from the source of seafood as you can get. But it’s there.

They have a seafood platter to die for, and it’s a really nice place too. So, I’ll be there on Wednesday night. I’ve got it planned.

So, tomorrow I’ve got to pack and re-charge all my toys; the iPod, the laptop, the camera, the cell phone.

And rehearse my line for when I hit that drive-thru at the Burger King.