Thursday, January 13, 2011

The Virus

Computer viruses have got to be the most vile, evil, insidious entities known to humanity. Those Egyptian plagues that occurred in the Old Testament are cookies-n-milk compared to what’s out there in cyberspace these days.

Here’s a typical scenario: You’re cruising along and suddenly get an alarming pop-up that reads, “Your computer has been infected by a malicious virus and will blow up in 30 seconds. Click here NOW to eradicate this potential threat.” In a state of stupidity, you click on it and there’s another pop-up that wants you to pay $90 for appropriate anti-viral thingie.

Well guess what? That thing you clicked on is actually THE VIRUS. Now the ninety-dollar invoice won’t go away. It takes up the entire screen. You can’t access the internet. Nothing.

I say that’s a scenario because – and I hate to admit it – that’s what happened to me.

Fortunately, I realized what had happened before I paid the ninety dollars.

I read up on this particular virus (on my laptop that I use for work) and found a Trojan-removing program that will remove it. Then, I read lots of reviews to make sure it was legitimate, downloaded it - - held my breath - - and it worked!

My computer must be a magnet for viruses. Even though I had paid for McAfee year after year, my PC must be awfully slutty, for it caught another virus last night. (Stupid McAfee was cowering in the bushes and did nothing in defense.) This time, pop-ups wouldn’t quit popping up and there was another offer to get rid of them. Ha! I had my super virus remover on hand. It found five malicious Trojans (see? slutty computer) but this time, it wanted $46.00 to remove them.

What??? It did it for free last time.

I hopped back on my work computer and read up on it. The reviews were good except for the fact that it now costs $46.00.

I paid it – held my breath – and it worked!

By the way, at work we use Malwarebytes to remove viruses, (it’s free, too) but even it didn’t find these malicious Trojans.

The program that worked is called Loaris. Yes, it costs $46.00 but it’s worked like a charm for me – twice.

I was angry that I had to shell out 46 bucks to get rid of this cyber venereal disease and was venting to a friend of mine. He pointed out that this was a lot cheaper and much more convenient than taking my PC into a store or shipping it off to Dell.

True. Great perspective.

So! I’m passing this information forward to you. If you have a PC with questionable moral discretion, gets a nasty virus that won’t go away, I highly recommend Loaris Trojan Remover.

And don’t click on anything.
It’s bad.



At 5:04 PM , Blogger Miss Healthypants said..., sir, need to quit clicking on everything! *grin*

At 5:05 PM , Blogger Miss Healthypants said...

And you have to teach your slutty computer about safe sex. *hee hee*


Post a Comment

Subscribe to Post Comments [Atom]

<< Home