Greater Effingham

Once again, I’m on one of my whirlwind trips around the great state of Illinois on work-related matters. Tonight, I’m in the wonderful city of Effingham, pop. 12,384.

Such a funny name, Effingham. This city bills itself as “The Crossroads of Opportunity” since IH 57 and IH 70 cross here. I’m not really sure how much opportunity there is here. The nice folks at the local Wal-Mart seemed to be a pretty glum bunch.

I’ve written about Effingham before because there’s a pretty notorious sight here. On the south end of town, there’s a huge, 200 ft white cross erected beside the highway. You can’t miss it. I’m sure many a fine folk might find it inspiring to see such a huge cross, but frankly, it’s a testament that there really can be too much of a good thing. The first time I saw it, I thought, “My, but that’s a bit overstated.”

Then, as you drive just a few miles south, in the middle of nowhere, is The Giant Porno Emporium. A couple of large signs by the highway make sure you don’t miss it. The juxtaposition of the Giant Cross with the Giant Porno Emporium makes Effingham one of the most interesting places in the whole wide world.

I didn’t notice it until this trip, but a few miles north of town is another Giant Porno Emporium. Yes!

I don’t know what’s going on with these Effinghamanians. Don’t they order their adult-type products online like all the other good Christian folk?

I guess that big cross was supposed to be a deterrent or something. Whatever.

Anyway, it’s good to be back in Greater Effingham.

Olney, Marion, Alton, Springfield and Peoria are next on this week’s itinerary.