Saturday, December 16, 2006

Dark Side of the Moon

Our dear friend in blogopia, Lorraine in Seattle, has been silenced by the terrible storm they experienced out there yesterday. JP over at All Things Bitter reported an initial contact with her by phone but then all contact was lost. I tried calling last night to no avail. Her site has been inactive since the storm. . . .

. . . It reminds me of when the Apollo astronauts orbited the dark side of the moon and Mission Control could have no contact with them. They'd just have to wait . . . and wait . . . in silence.

I have to admit that the idea of Lorraine not posting anything is pretty depressing.

I was teasing Lorraine awhile back after she admitted an addiction to emailing. I said she suffers from epistulariphilia, or rather, an addiction to correspondence. I must admit to having a pretty advanced case of it as well.

I wonder how our dear Lorraine is fairing, having suddenly been cut off from the world? News reports say that Seattle could be without power for the entire weekend. As an addiction counselor, I'm concerned that Lorraine, as an epistulariphiliac, will suffer some pretty severe withdrawal symptoms having been cut off from all correspondence so suddenly. These symptoms are likely to include:

1. Tremors
2. Sweating
3. Confusion
4. Nausea
5. Hallucinations (both visual and auditory)
6. Extreme Bitchiness (i.e. irritability)

I'm concerned that she'll be doing this without a supervised detox. It won't be pretty.

I hope her friends and family members (The Spouse and The Child and The Neighbor and The Dog) will know how to handle someone experiencing acute withdrawal from epistulariphilia. They're likely to find dear, sweet Lorraine crying and hugging the laptop in a fetal position on the floor in the middle of the night. Or worse, they might find her sucking on the mouse in a frantic attempt to communicate with the outside world.

At least, that's how I'd be found if I had no internet access.

I hope The Child won't be traumetized by the sight of her mother in the throes of withdrawel. Seeing something like that could scar the poor thing for life.

Let's all say a prayer for our dear friend that she and her loved ones can make it through the weekend. I know that all of us at Mission Control will give a big cheer when we hear that first correspondence eeked out from the dark side of the moon.

We'll keep you posted.


At 4:55 PM , Blogger Lorraine said...

Houston? Do you read? Over.

Thanks for your concern. You should know that I have experienced all the symptoms you mentioned, except #5. We are finding ways to remain chipper, including eating left-over party food. And of course, the corkscrew is a manual.

Don't know when we'll be back up and running...just thought I'd check in while I could. We're fine. It could have been so much worse. (You're going to freak when you see what didn't fall on our house).

Thanks for all your concern. You don't know how much we all appreciate it!


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