Wednesday, November 08, 2006

Santorum Defeated -- Gays Hospitalized

Philadelphia -- As Senator Rick Santorum, known for his opposition to gay rights, gave a heartfelt concession speech on Nov. 7, emergency rooms all across Pennsylvania were inundated by thousands of gays and lesbians across the Keystone State.

A spokesperson for Our Lady of the Resurrection hospital in Philadelphia reported, "We saw thousands of hand and digit injuries, apparently from too many over-enthusiastic high-fives experienced by our gay and lesbian patients."

Meanwhile, the ex-Senator has reportedly purchased a used mobile home for himself and his family since he will now be earning the federal minimum wage of $5.15 per hour.

3 Comments:

At 1:28 PM , Blogger Lorraine said...

There were plenty of straights with similar injuries last night. Myself among them. When that news came out, frankly, I didn't even care what happened the rest of the night. ('K, a little I did) because it boded so well. Yippee skippee!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 
At 9:37 PM , Blogger Iwanski said...

Goodbye Rick Santorum.

A lot of people may mock you and say lots of bad things about you and call you a stupid bigot, but always remember this one thing--

They're totally right.

 
At 10:50 AM , Blogger Red7Eric said...

Is that why my hands still hurt?

 

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