For the past four nights, citizens of Clintonville,
Wisconsin (pop. 4,763) have been baffled by loud, trembling booming sounds that
occur only during the night. Some of the exploding sounds have even caused cracks
to appear in walls and basement foundations. Insurance companies refuse to
cover the damage until a cause is identified.
The booming sounds are reportedly spreading to towns south
of Clintonville.
I love mysteries like this!
I looked up Clintonville on the map and it would be an easy
drive from Chicago. If I wasn’t so busy this weekend, I would be up there to
spend a couple of nights. I’m thinking of cancelling a Friday night dinner
engagement in order to go up there.
So, what do you think it is?
My guess—it’s the military. It’s always the military. As obscenely
large as our military is, they’re up to something.
Remember the mysterious lights that appeared over Phoenix?
It was the military.
The UFO that crashed in the small town of Kecksburg, Pennsylvania back
in the 1960s?
It was the military.
The Loch Ness Monster is probably some military experiment
on an eel that went awry.
But still, I want to spend the night in Clintonville,
Wisconsin to be a part of this. If I go, I’ll be sure to report from behind the
Cheddar Curtain.
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