Debra for a Weekend

A couple of weeks ago, I had the pleasure of finding a rather large lump in my underarm. I hadn’t noticed it before because there was no pain to call attention to it;
But there it was.

So, I went to my friendly primary care physician who felt me up and said I should have a specialist feel me up as well. He said it was probably nothing, but large lumps should definitely be checked out.

That was last Friday.

Besides making two batches of bread-n-butter jalapenos, I spent the weekend catastrophizing and feeling my lump. I Wikipedia’d everything I could find about armpit lumps and spent more time catastrophizing.

I played the theme to Terms of Endearment over and over on the piano.
It was all very Debra Winger.

So I saw the specialist today and he assured me very quickly that I didn’t need to play Terms of Endearment anymore. However, I do have a lime-sized lipoma that really should be removed.

So, I’m scheduled for outpatient surgery a week from Friday. I have to get a responsible person to take me home afterward and I was able to procure my friend, Jack, to do so. I thought about asking Iwanski to do that but I really didn’t want to ask him to be a responsible person this soon after the last time.

Sigh . . .

Wouldn’t you know it?
I turn fifty, finally get my head together . . .

. . . And my ass falls apart.