My new "calling"

I just read where GM is installing a an Onstar device on its new cars which would enable police officers to have a car stopped. For example, if the car is involved in a high-speed chase, the highway patrol and radio in and have the car come to a gradual halt.

That’s pretty cool. I’m sure the news networks will hate this because they get such huge audiences whenever there’s a high-speed chase.

I don’t think this ability should be limited it to cars involved in high-speed chases though.

Have you ever had one of those “macho-cars” pull up alongside with the bass booming so loud that it affects the earth’s rotation? I’d love to be able to call in and have them come to a grinding halt. Serve ‘em right.

And those durf-wads that take up two parking spaces? If they think they’re so special, then they should just remain there for a day or two.

What about drivers who aren’t wearing panties? The car should come to a halt and the doors lock automatically. We know what happens when they try to exit their automobiles. No one should have to be exposed to that kind of nonsense.

Oh, and those soccer moms who drive SUVs so big that they should have Leonardo di Caprio and Kate Winslett as a hood ornament – driving by themselves? Wrong! They should go nowhere. Let the rich kids walk home from soccer.

I should become a consultant for Onstar.
Really.