Ouch!

Wed Aug 22, 10:53 AM ET

MOSCOW (Reuters) - A woman set fire to her ex-husband's penis as he sat naked watching television and drinking vodka, Moscow police saidWednesday.

Asked if the man would make a full recovery, a police spokeswoman said it was "difficult to predict."

The attack climaxed three years of acrimonious enforced co-habitation. The couple divorced three years ago but continued to share a small flat, something common in Russia where property costs are very high.

"It was monstrously painful," the wounded ex-husband told Tvoi Den newspaper. "I was burning like a torch. I don't know what I did to deserve this."

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Now, there's a remedy for you. If your husband is irritating you, just flambé his naughty parts!
Why would anyone watch TV in the nude? And with flammable material in close proximity?

I can just hear him now:

"Мой пенис горит!
Мой пенис горит! . . .
. . . Bitch!"