Monday, June 25, 2007

UFOs

I have to admit it, I'm a big fan of all the UFO documentaries on TV. If there's a program about UFOs on the Science Channel, National Geographic Channel, Discovery Channel and the like (I call them my "Geek Channels"), my Tivo knows that I love that stuff and will record it for me.

It also records Judge Judy and anything with Margaret Cho, but that's another story.

I'm sure there are countless civilizations way more advanced than ours throughout the universe. Our little human minds can't even begin to fathom how vast the universe is, so we've no business even thinking for a moment that we're the only ones around.

If aliens are coming here then they've obviously got brains way more advanced than ours. The nearest solar systems are hundreds of light years away. One light year is 5,878,625,373,184 miles. That takes some mighty advanced know-how to travel that far.

So why the hell are they going to New Mexico of all places? Have you ever been to New Mexico? I've driven across it a couple of times and it's pretty boring. Aside from the fact that everything's made of adobe and there's a few tasty places to eat, there's not a lot going on there.

If I was traveling 98 quadrillion miles, I'd want to visit somewhere a little more interesting like, I dunno, New York perhaps? Take in a Broadway show? Stay at the Plaza?

But no. Our alien friends have yet to be seen there. They seem to favor New Mexico and small villages in Siberia instead.

I can just see it, a dinner party back on planet Gork:

"Hey Zontar, you guys went to Earth last year, didn't you? We were thinking of going to Paris for our vacation this time."

"Oh no! Paris is crawling with tourists and the Euro is sky high right now. Go to Roswell! It's just gorgeous this time of year!"

"Whaddya think, honey. Shall we take the kids to Roswell instead? . . Yeah?. . . Then, Roswell it is!"

"But whatever you do, don't drink the water."

Sort of makes you wonder. . .

I guess it's all in the perspective.

3 comments:

  1. Well, perhaps advanced life forms can see things in Roswell that escape our rudimentary internal ocular systems technology.

    Speaking of inferior technology, my DVR won't automatically record based on performers, but if it did, Margaret would totally be in the mix.

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  2. Anonymous3:48 PM

    I've noticed it's kind of the same way with God. He never shows up as a glowing image over the Pope's Easter Blessing or the Billy Graham revivle, but instead in a piece of a little old Mexican ladie's toast.

    Kind of makes you wonder if Moses was alive today if he would be in an Arkansas diner wearing a John Deere cap when the Lord called him to service.

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  3. And how come the only people they ever want to probe live in trailer parks?

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